Some 50,000 a year seek the support of family courts and most are granted contact orders. However in a surprisingly large number of cases, for whatever reasons, mum discourages or eliminates contact despite these orders by the court, preferring to airbrush dad out of their own, and by some cruel and unmotherly extension, their children’s lives. We have seen thousands of such cases, many despite tens of thousands spent on lawyers and court costs (by each family) resulting in little more than more pain for the children.
Jerry Karlin, Chair and Managing Trustee of FNF says: “It’s a disgrace. Thousands of Parents With Care (PWCs), mostly mums, disregard such orders and treat them as optional. Of the over 5,000 annual applications for enforcement, courts only take action to enforce their own orders in less than 2% of cases. And as if this was not enough, our Child Maintenance, Parental Leave and benefits systems undermine gender equality by offering mothers and PWCs financial incentives for excluding their ex-partners from fuller parental roles.”
Our family support systems are broken. The Relationship Foundation calculated the cost of family breakdown to be £48bn (2016) or £1,820 per tax payer! In many other jurisdictions such primitive approaches are substantively consigned to history. ‘Let dads be dads’ and ‘Men need to be seen as fathers’ said H.E. Staffan Herrstrom, a Swedish ambassador to several countries last week, on a UNICEF blog. He is so right.
A FNF Father’s Day survey carried out last year received 441 responses and given the issues highlighted above, it is perhaps not so surprising that:
- 60% of respondents’ children were unable to have any direct contact with their fathers last year!
- This was made up of 47% of respondents said that their children were unable to mark Father’s Day at all last year and a further 13% said that they would only have contact by phone, email or by post.
FNF appeals to all Parents including grandparents, to support children’s relationships with both parents, and especially on this Father’s Day, for separated fathers. Please consider whether the obstacles that are so often put in the way of such relationships are really in the child’s interest.
Jerry Karlin adds: “We call upon the government to review family policies to ensure the family justice system ceases to result, for thousands of children and parents each year, in wicked and damaging injustice. Stop this abuse of children now!”
Please address any queries/requests for data to FNF (media@fnf.org.uk) - 0300 0300 110.
Notes for editors:
Families Need Fathers - because both parents matter
FNF is a registered charity providing information and support on shared parenting issues arising from family breakdown, and support to divorced and separated parents, irrespective of gender or marital status. FNF is NOT a fathers' rights group - we support the best interests of children - namely mature and collaborative parenting by both parents - an objective which is inadequately promoted in the family court system and associated services.
Our primary concern is the maintenance of the child’s meaningful relationship with both parents.
Founded in 1974, FNF helps thousands of parents every year.